A Few Good Words (blog & graffiti pics)

For a majority of the sixty-six years of my life, I have wanted to be a musician. I have made attempts to learn various instruments and have learned and forgotten how to read music (at a basic level). Early in life, I formed my own definition and images of what it meant to have a musician identity or be a songwriter. 

A true musician could read music as easily as I read a children’s book. A true musician could play music perfectly and consistently in front of an audience. When a true musician mastered a song or a difficult passage, they could continue to play that music correctly and skillfully. A true musician has the skills. I didn’t know enough to realize that this was not always the case. I wanted to be a guitar player who 'has the chops.' 

Before, if someone asked if I am a musician, I would say, 'I play around with guitars and drums,' or something equally noncommittal. But now I will say, 'Yes, I am a musician.' While I may not possess the skills I once idolized, I love my instruments and use them regularly. I can create sounds that are sometimes pleasing and consistent. I don’t feel the need to hold myself back by refusing to own a name I can claim if I choose. I don’t have to be a great musician, just good enough for myself.

Now, when I answer the question, 'Am I a musician?' I say, 'Yes, a piss poor musician.' There’s no shame or embarrassment in that, because I am good enough for now and I can still improve. In fact, I often find band naming inspiration in my journey, and who knows, maybe one day I’ll even use a creative band name generator to find a name that truly reflects my journey. I can live with that.